I couldn't ride today, I didn't have time due to taking my son back to university. So B and I went into the arena. Yet again she couldn't do anything but stand with her head dropped. I hung around with her and chatted to Jan for a while. B then decided she didn't want to to stand around and do nothing. She stood near me and yawned her head off!
I have been thinking about this behaviour for a little while and also wondering why things seem to be going backwards. I know there is the injury issue and not being ridden for two weeks could make B feel unconfident in the woods but the issues we are having started before that. It seems like 6 months ago we started off well and I wonder if it's not unusual for things to get worse before they get better.
Today it felt like B wasn't being a partner, that she was being very LB and just plain not wanting to do anything. It seems pointless to ask why because I can never know and I try not to be anthropomorphic about it too. This Parelli-ism came to mind..'if you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you always got' and lately I have been very careful with B not to push her in case she either exploded or went very deeply introverted.
I revisited the game of point to point with treats and that seemed to persuade B that she would like doing something. We had yo yo over a pole and some nice circle game, in trot too. We left the arena on a good note and made our way to the yard exit. I thought it would be good to play some approach and retreat with leaving the yard and see where B's thresholds were and see if I could build some confidence.
Well, no sign of lack of confidence but a complete horsenality change and I had Miss 'I don't want to and you can't make me' LBI show up! She just looked at me and stuck her head in the air refusing to move. What is it now? Oh yes 'the attitude is justice' and it was time to be assertive and see what happens. I held on to the line and refused to budge. She stopped bracing, didn't go introverted and walked over the road pretty sharpish with a little help from the c/s. I had asked once, then twice, then the phase 4 I used (which would have been a phase one with Lizzie) certainly helped B focus on me! Suddenly I had both eyes and although she was snotty she realised I was the leader today and she had better move her butt.
We went into the woods after some attitude in the car park from B because I was more assertive than I had been of late. We played approach and retreat away from the exit going left and right with grass to eat when we stopped. B was ok going down the mile and 1/4 but going past the other way, she threw little tantrums and stamped her feet and tossed her head. When she stopped she would crowd me so we had to up the phases again to get back up and stay there with a lot of licking and chewing from her. So we did this a few times until she could go past without showing signs of wanting to leave or even hesitate. She offered me sideways and backwards beautifully for which she got rest and a treat/grass. When we left the woods I asked her to stop and back up next to me a few times and saw that she was very soft and the respect was back.
I like that look on her face. Her eyes are soft and follow my every move and she wants to be with me. Plus she looks relaxed as if all is well in her world.
Looks like I got the balance back 49/51%. Now all I need to do is find this when I am riding, I wish I knew how.
Hi Cilla,
ReplyDeleteLeft brain introverts sure can do a great job of either getting us to do way more than them (who's moving who's feet?) or causing us to stop asking them to do more (often in case they get even more unhappy about it, which we don't want). But as you saw here, you upping your leadership on the ground led to her giving you more respect. Getting that same respect in the saddle is something I struggled with for a long time too. The first thing to think about is that if want X much leadership in the saddle, then you first need to get XXX much leadership on the ground. Second, at some point you need to be able to be confident enough to match her energy and add 4oz when you're in the saddle. For me that was a scary prospect, but with my mare I found that it actually didn't take that much (LOTS of disengaging, sometimes to the point of dizziness!) for her to hand over leadership. I also asked a more competent friend (a Parelli instructor actually) to ride her and show me where I might have to go with her. That gave me a lot of confidence. I'm not saying that it's going to be the same for you, but I sure understand how you're feeling. See if you can take your leadership on the ground even further, that's going to help you a lot. Keep going - you're doing great!
~ Beth, Parelli Central
Thanks Beth, thats really helpful about the riding. Just as well I am used to LBI's.
ReplyDeleteStill surprises me that a horse can be more than one horsenality lol.