Tuesday 27 September 2011

Relationship IN the saddle.

Today was HUGE!!! I can hardly type I am so full of excitement, energy and joy! Had a lesson with Claire Burgess today and B and I rode in the arena!!! We played for 3/4 of an hour before the lesson and Claire turned up just in time to see B cantering on the 45 like a very relaxed LBE! Downwards transitions with no explosions and then back up into canter again! I love to watch this LBE of mine starting to enjoy the sensation of cantering instead of the RBE running scared.

I can't quite remember what happened after that until we were doing some saddle prep. I probably rabbited on and on about the last month and what we have been up to. I feel compelled to tell Claire as much as I can and I remembered to ask about this continuing switching off that B does now and again. We had a bit of a day of it Sunday when lately her introversion had almost disappeared. B will always go there. there will be times when I hardly notice and others when I worry about it. Just the way she is. I know how to give her the support she needs so it will never be too much of a worry.



B was so LB I found I needed to be very particular about her standing in exactly the same spot to be saddled when she moved. Her behaviour until recently has been RBE , she has needed a lot of care and taking things slowly and being very careful with her emotions. It is wonderful to see the LBE side of her emerging, even LBI some of the time. There are times when I wonder if I can really deal with her and that perhaps I should have settled for another sensible cob type. But we are far down the road in our relationship now and I couldn't part with Breeze. We are well and truly partners and the idea of losing her is unthinkable. Plus she is so different now. I should do another horsenality chart and see where we are. B will always be innately RBE/LBE and sometimes go to extremes but in general I think she has become a lot more settled and even.


I upped my leadership, got saddled, did the girth up too quickly (sorry B)  and got on like I did it every day. Claire remarked on how nice and quick and excellent it was lol. I needed a little adjustment as it looks like I have got into a habit of perching too far forwards. This might explain my tension last Sunday. I think it's been creeping up on me slowly and I had got out of the habit of checking my position. Into power position and relax, what a difference it made immediately. Guess what, B relaxed too! We sat there and did nothing. That is such a bid deal for us. I have dreamed of this day when B and I would be back in that arena doing nothing. In her life before me it's always been work, work, work, move now, here, there, until she knew nothing but get it done now! My own experience of arena riding has been some lessons when I first learned to ride on unwilling uncooperative school horses, then lessons with Lizzie who did as I asked grudgingly. Followed by B and I attempting to do some follow the rail after our course at Stoneleigh and I see now I was far too tense and direct line. Plus, the magic of Stoneleigh does wear off especially when you go back to a 'normal' yard. B was a different horse on our course, surrounded by love and understanding and that wonderful Parelli bubble.

Next some lateral flexion, a few adjustments again and it was superb. I had jokingly told Claire B has trouble with the right side...not if you ask nicely lol. We had a little walk around, I asked B to turn away from the gate, she braced, I tensed and leaned forward. A little reminder from Claire about focus and persistence and B relaxed and went where I asked! At this point Claire asked what I should do as we stopped and I let out a big sigh, Claire jokingly said and now you Breeze.......B let out an even bigger sigh. Wish we had got that on camera!


It's all about the relationship IN the saddle, not just the leadership. I knew something was missing and this is it! Probably very obvious to everyone but me. I just couldn't pin point what I needed to do and how. Fear got in the way. I cannot describe how it felt. I think B has learned such a lot since i got her and changed dramatically. I have a habit of belittling my achievements and doubt my ability all the time. To feel even more relaxation in her and feel really safe was a revelation. I know we have come such a long way but new things become familiar and get taken for granted. As I explained to Claire, it's so difficult to gauge progress when you have no one and nothing around you to compare with. I concentrate on not looking at what goes on around me but all the same I am influenced no matter how hard I try not to be. I have found no matter how many Parelli dvd's I watch, celebrations I go to and courses I go on there is no substitute for someone being there when you need them in person to help and point the way. I am always astonished at how good Claire is as a teacher too. I get her and she gets me. It doesn't seem to matter how badly we explain things we understand what we are trying to say. Most importantly she understands the nature of my fear and even more importantly knows how to help me overcome it.


When I got off, amazingly gracefully I have to say......in front of Claire I usually make a mess of everything that requires balance and coordination, I was amazed to see B's expression. Complete calm and relaxation. She looked totally LB and as if she had actually enjoyed herself. I know that's anthropomorphism but there was no mistaking her mood. I watched her mosey out into the field swinging her butt without any tension in her body at all and couldn't help but grin like an idiot!



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